Prepping for Ragnar

So, I'm packing for Ragnar, and I have made a mess in my living room. Two days- do I really need this stuff? After some organization and putting separate running gear in plastic bags, I have this mess (it was worse, I promise!):

      

I have extra clothes, a couple of basic toiletries, safety vests, sunscreen, a travel pillow and backpacking mat.... And I'm not quite set. I still have a couple food items I want to grab, and I will bring a sleeping bag in the off chance I am able to catch some zz's. 

When I pack, I normally get out EVERYTHING I might possibly need. Ideally, I start to do this a couple days before I need to be packed. When we went to Hawaii, I think I had my bag out for a week and kept throwing things in as I thought of them. Tomorrow, I will probably look at my pile one last time, weed out the unnecessary items, and call it a day. Let's hope I don't forget any essentials!

I am feeling a little bit nervous for the whole ordeal. I'm running the first leg. Setting the pace. Am I going to start us ahead of or behind schedule? I shouldn't worry too much about it... My goal is to keep a consistent pace and get to the next exchange. No big deal. After my first run, the remaining two will be much easier.  The difficulty of my runs get progressively easier, so I have that working in my favor. 

When I run, my biggest hurdle is me. Sometimes, I can't get myself out of my head. I know that probably sounds odd, but it is what it is. Physically, my body can keep going, but pushing myself mentally is a big challenge. I'm not really sure why, but it is something I need to improve, and this weekend I have a great opportunity to do so! (Perhaps I will write more about this later).

Anyways, I am looking forward to this new experience.  Ragnar will be the first event I have participated in with a distance greater than 5k. I'm very much hoping I enjoy this, because I have signed up for a half marathon in September!

Cheers to new adventures and old socks. 

Let's do this!

Decision-Making

This is something I constantly find myself struggling with...seriously, just talk to my husband.  If you were to ask him what my weaknesses are, he would probably say that indecision is on the top of the list...Actually, he is really nice, so he would probably tell you "she's perfect." Ha-ha, isn't that funny?

I know some people make a list of pros and cons on a yellow legal pad, wait, that's wrong.  Who am I kidding? No one uses legal pads...I believe there is an app for that. Ok, let me start over: I am sure many people use their digital devices to make a list of pros/cons, or perhaps they have a better memory and do this mentally (I err on this side, but I don't always remember the list I made, so it isn't the most effective process). Sometimes, the decisions are not that difficult, or at least they shouldn't be.

Should I wear my Toms or my flip flops? Do I want a blizzard with Reeses or Heath?  Am I going to study today or take on that mess in my yard? Red or white wine? But then there are the harder decisions: Do I take this job? Do we move across the country? How do I confront someone I care about regarding this or that? Should I take on this new leadership role? How do we know what God wants us to do?

I often hear people say things like: What is the universe telling you to do? Are you sure about this? What feels right? Or, for the Christian, maybe this is a sign from God?  Have you prayed about it?  God will lead you.

I just don't know.  There is so much I don't know, or don't understand in life, in scripture...scripture?  I think that is where I need to start.

It seems that we can look at the life of Jesus. What did HE do? What did HE say?  How can I implement that into my life?

Unless there is a clear moral answer, can we ever really know what God 'wants' us to do?  I'm not sure, but I think we can use the information we have to make a well-informed decision.  I'm still working on this Biblically, and trying to figure out how to incorporate prayer and how to 'listen' to God in these situations.  This thought is still a work in progress, but here is what I have so far:

1) we should pray and ask God for wisdom

2) allow the Spirit to be our helper

3) seek counsel from other Godly people

James 1:5 suggests that we should ask God for wisdom.  This is much different then asking God to give us a 'sign' or to 'tell' us what to do.  In fact,God provides us with the resources we need, including those for decision making.

In John 14 Jesus promises that even in His absence He will be with us.  How you ask? The Holy Spirit! Jesus describes the Holy Spirit as a helper who will dwell within us. I don't know about you, but I can use all of the help I can get.. So thank God for the Spirit!

Then, Proverbs is filled with words about seeking wisdom and guidance. Proverbs 8:33 tells us, "Hear instruction and be wise, and do not neglect it."  We can seek counsel and advice from those who have gone before us, and from other Godly people. God has provided us with a community to benefit from one another through teaching, fellowship and discipleship. Yet another resource given to us by God - people!

Perhaps, if we pray and ask for wisdom, allow the spirit to reside within us, and seek counsel from other Godly people, God will provide enough.  God does not tell us to sit idly and wait for Him to decide for us.  So get out your legal pad, use the tools He has given and make decisions faithfully. 

 

The Crash of Twenty-Thirteen

No, not a stock market crash. Something worse, much, much, worse...Just kidding. Let me get to the point:
A couple weeks ago I posted a picture of Jason and I on our first date.  Well, as I was searching for the photo it occurred to me that my hard drives (yes, plural) had crashed several months ago. In fact, I think it was actually last year (hence the crash of 2013).  I haven't been taking a lot of photos lately, so this has not been on the top of mind.  Anyways, I'm searching for this photo and cannot find it anywhere.  I looked in my pile of back-up CDs from ages ago (do people still use those?), I looked on Facebook, Picasa, checked the hard drives I have that DO still work...nothing...then, it occurred to me that I had made a photo book from Shutterfly in the last few years which had those photos! I log in, and there it is! Woohoo!

This weekend, Jason and I completely finished the pond demolition, and proceeded to weed, then fill in the entire area with dirt. We have been working tirelessly on various home projects and were admiring how much we have accomplished:





The pond extended from the far right of our vegetable garden, under our walkway and all the way to the edge of our windows.  It hadn't actually been used in nearly 30 years.

More practical than stagnant pond water.

Now, I know this probably looks pretty insignificant to you, I mean, all we did was move some rocks and pull some weeds? Right?... WRONG.  I would love to show you some 'before' pictures, but that too was lost in the hard drive crash of 2013. When we moved in, there was a rose bush the size of my car (okay, maybe 2/3 of that)...roses have been transplanted (and pruned) to a new space, and now we have beautiful hops.  The pond and several trees are gone. We have a fire pit, a vegetable garden, and a nice fence.

SO. MUCH. WORK. 

 

The rose bushes were so overgrown that you could not open the gate to our deck.

Slowly but surely, our sweat equity is bearing returns.  Actually, it turns out I enjoy pouring my energy into our home.  It feels good to know that I am caring for this space where I will spend several years with my husband, my cat, and maybe someday children (sorry honey, we are NEVER moving).  Hard work not only makes me feel accomplished, but it is biblical!  Perhaps some of my efforts are spent out of pride and vanity, but I would prefer to hope otherwise.  I hope that our efforts are making our home a place where we can better practice hospitality.  I want guests to come into my home and feel at ease.  Actually, I want them to feel comfortable before they even get to the door.  When we are comfortable we start to lower the guard and become vulnerable.  I diverge, this is not what this post was intended to be about.  I'm sure hospitality will be a topic for another day!

Anyways, the point is that I am disappointed in these now non-functioning hard drives... my trip to Australia, our honeymoon, and random moments from here n'there were on those devices.  Surprisingly, I am not too upset.  However, I am wondering how I am going to store photos from here out.  Simple is preferable.

So, all of that to say, I have a question for all of you.  What do you rely on for digital storage? Discs? Hard drive? The cloud? Any specific programs or providers?  There are downfalls to each - CDs and hard drives will not last forever, online storage is likely to have some sort of ongoing subscription cost, etc.

Your turn.

Put That Gun Away, Please

Another shooting.  Already? The shooting at SPU was only 5 days ago.  Then, 2 days ago there was a shooting in Las Vegas. And now, a shooting at Reynolds High School in Troutdale, OR.  Lord help us.

I remember sitting in an elementary school classroom when our teacher had to tell us that there was a shooting at Thurston High School...I didn't know anyone at Thurston, but some of my classmates did... cousins, brothers and sisters of their friends, a daughter of mom's friend who had babysat for them a few times before...  At the time, I don't really think I fully understood what was happening, but I did know it was scary and it was wrong.  I thought schools were a safe place?

Sadly, it isn't just shootings, and it isn't just in schools.  I recently heard a news report about two 12 year old girls who stabbed another child all in the name of some fictional character (trying to prove allegiance, I believe)... I was too appalled to continue reading the article.
 
Regardless of political stance, liberals and conservatives alike should both be able to identify that this is a problem.  Our society has developed quite the propensity for violence (or so it would seem).  I'm not sure if this is attributed to video games, television, or lack of care for the mentally ill.  Plus, correlation does not indicate causation, and I have not done the research. Perhaps is just seems that there has been an increase in violent crimes due to faster information sharing, or if actual occurrences are happening more frequently...

I am fearful for my generation, and the next.   The thought that we will live in a world where this is frequent, is and should be a saddening.  Will these school shootings and other violent acts simply become 'another' news story?  I worry that we will become numbed to the emotions that cause us to be compassionate human beings.

What I do know is that we should fervently pray for people who are tempted by the flesh to behave in this way.  We should pray that they do not find access to the weapon they are seeking, that they have a moment of clarity before acting, or better yet, that they get the help they need before committing such a crime.  We should be in prayer that Christ will abound and knit us together in love, and that we can diligently share His love with those who do not know it.  Through Christ, and Christ alone, we can be changed, and made whole again.  I sincerely pray for the love and grace of Christ to grow and spread over his people like wildfire. 

In the meantime, I pray you have the mind to take these things seriously, and if you choose to keep a weapon in your household that you do so carefully, responsibly and safely.

Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has been born of God, and everyone who loves the Father loves whoever has been born of him. By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments. For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome. For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world except the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?  1 John 5:1-5

MAYhem

WOWZERS! (that's right, I said it.)

What a month!  Looking back at what May has brought, I am feeling full. So full. Psalm 23 sums it up pretty well. In May:

• We ran a 5k - I had sub 10 minute miles (this is AWESOME for me!).  Afterwards, I made my first breakfast bake and sweet potato hash and got to fellowship with friends.
• No studying this month - so I picked up a handful of books that I am looking forward to reading.
• Great weather for outdoor soccer - we haven't been rained on yet! And, no injuries to report this season. (so far)
• Date-a-versary.  Jason and I had our first date 9 years ago. Has it really been that long?
  
  

  

  My Junior Prom, May 2005

  
  
• We visited Lake Chelan for the first time.  Big house. Lots of friends. Wine tasting. Sunshine without the sunburn.
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
• Jason built me a raised garden. Vegetables have been planted (and are growing).  I may have to put him to work on a second garden....
  
  
  
• I am about to sign up for my first half marathon - yikes!
• I spent time and was able to catch up with a few friends I hadn't seen in a looong time.  
• We painted our bathroom. This has been on our to-do list for a very. long. time.

  

  ....and it may have grossed me out a bit.

  
  

  

  We may have discovered a dirty mess...

  

  ...but now it is clean...Amazing what a little bit of paint can do!

• I think we have both had some PR's in crossfit this month. In fact, I have battle wounds from a hero workout called Murph.  Learn about the hero, Navy Seal Michael Murphy, here.

My knees...because I still do 'girl' push-ups.

• Jason is wrapping up the month by spending the weekend in Denver visiting his brother, and today I was able to attend a baby shower for one of my best friends. 

I am so glad for all the fun and productive activities we were able to do this month.  I have this constant struggle with the 'battle of busy', but I think this month we had an adequate amount of time to rest, play, and be productive....but more on that another time.  Right now, I'm just going to be grateful for the month of May.

Cheers!

Internal pressure in an external world

Do you ever feel like you just aren't doing it right? Whatever it may be...work, dating/marriage, other relationships, parenting, social skills, evangelizing, right down to the nitty-gritty details, like how those stains come out on laundry day. Life?

Christ instructs us to be in the world, but not to be OF the world.  This is hard. Everyday. 

We are surrounded by people and media who influence us. We watch, we learn, we listen...and sometimes we think why can't I be like that? Don't let them fool you. They may seem confident, and maybe they are (most of the time). But don't think for a minute that they don't have any insecurities... we all have moments of doubt. 

It seems many of the pressures we feel may be self-induced.  Do we assume we are inadequate based on the rest of the world?  Are we creating problems we don't have?

We are all victim to our own thoughts, and they may go something like this:
Am I keeping up on the house properly? Work is exhausting, should I even be doing this job?  Do I belong here? Did I say the right thing? Did I do the right thing? Did he notice my new haircut? Are we still friends? I should call, or should I?  Double-guessing yourself. I heard she does it this way, maybe I should do it that way, too. The comparisons. Am I being as good of a wife as so-and-so? Then, the guilt.  Oh no, I forgot another birthday.  I didn't have time to clean the house before guests arrive. I just want to be more like.... Jesus, help me! 

And He does.  Every time.  When I start to detract my focus from Him, I find the insecurities hiding in the depths of my mind and feel the pressures of the world weigh in on my heart.  However, God has provided us with the gift of Christ, who carries our burdens...even when we feel like we can't keep up. 

I am never going to get all of it right. Neither are you. So, how do we move forward knowing that old insecurities will wear us down, and new pressures will test us? I am trying my best to learn, keep going when I get it wrong, and most importantly accept the grace that Christ has provided for us.

In the beginning

Here it goes!

Let me begin by explaining to you why I have decided to begin blogging:

1. I may have something important to say.  I guess we will find out, eh?
2. Like many people out there, I love photography.  I take many photos that just end up sitting somewhere on a hard drive - it's time to share!
3. Communication. I would much rather sit down and talk over a glass of wine, but distance IS an issue.
4. I want to be accountable to myself to live a better life - I am hoping that blogging will help me to continually strive to improve (because you will be watching!).
5. I'm a slow mover.  I guess I'll start now.

Okay, so maybe my reasons aren't great, and perhaps I don't have anything fantastic to share...in fact, this blog is going to be cheesy, full of poor grammar, improper punctuation, misspelled words (spell check should help in that regard).  It won't be eloquent, but then again, I'm not here for the poetry. 

For now, this blog is a little bit about my life, my thoughts, and how I am growing through Christ.  A theme may evolve with time, but for now you should expect a little bit of everything, or a lot of nothing.

Cheers friends!